Thursday, April 30, 2009

Missing Winter

I miss winter. I can't believe I said that. I don't like winter. I like Fall. I hate to drive in the snow. I hate that my family has to drive in the snow. I don't like the ice and the cold. This winter was a rough one. It seemed like it started early and lasted late. We had a lot of snow, ice and bitter cold. I couldn't wait for it to be over and rejoiced when it was.

I have felt this way about various trials in my life. Some have been rough. They seemed to start early and last forever. There was a bitterness in the battle and a tension driven journey to the Throne of God. You know those battles where you feel like your knuckles are turning white as you kneel in prayer. You keep your head down and try to stay focused on what you must do to get home safely. You seek God like never before. You find yourself flat on your face knowing that He is your only hope. You grip your bible like a steering wheel on an icy-road. If you let go, you might just slide right into the nearest ditch. You rejoice when you make it safely home. There is a sense of accomplishment.

When I am in the midst of them, I long for the trials and difficult times to end. But it is during those times that I know that I am closest to God. I cling to Him and seek Him with more passion. I run to Him to comfort me. I call out His name with an expectation that He will answer me because He is God and He loves me. I stay focused on Him. And then the victory comes, the icy-testing subsides and there is rejoicing. But with that, I seem to start running ahead of God again. It is easy to forget the things of God that bring me comfort and security when times are good.

I miss my slippers. As spring arrives, I found them slipping under the bed. Seeing them made me miss winter and the comforts that come inside during a winter storm. The smell of fresh baked cookies. The warmth of a blanket and lit candles as you sit on the couch with a good book and a cup of coffee. Snuggling! All the while a fierce storm can be going on outside with winds blowing, bitter cold, ice and lots of snow. You are safe inside. Safe in the shelter of home.

I pray that as spring breaks forth with all the promise of new life both literally and spiritually, that I don't find myself allowing my bible and my time with God to just slip away from me. May God continue to keep his arms around me, lest I forget how far he has brought me.

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