On Friday night a seismic shift took place. The visible preparation for this shift started taking place about 6 years ago. But on Friday night when my husband stood before a group of other couples and professed the most amazing words of love to me, the shift occurred. It was a shifting that allowed 1 Peter 3 and Ephesians 5 to be a reality in our lives. The clanging of the chains of bondage falling off and the demolition of the walls of strongholds created long ago could be heard in the heavens. I felt the earthquake-like tremors in the depths of my soul and I knew that God's work in our marriage had just made a tremendous leap.
For two people madly in love with each other, marriage should have somehow been easier. But two people madly in love without Jesus as the center - are well just two people prone to a whole lot of worldly mistakes and hurt. We are evidence of God's grace, protection, provision, forgiveness and strength.
I know in my heart that God has been working on us and for us our entire marriage. It became apparent when we started attending church several years ago. Many sins, bondages and lifestyles choices came to a fairly sudden stop. Some took a little longer to work through. We have more to go. But when you have spent 23 years together not everything changes overnight, no matter how much you long for it to. Years of marriage without God at the center allowed for years of all kinds of other junk to fill both of our lives.
The last several months have been difficult for many reasons. You see, I believe, that when God is about to make a major shift in your marriage or your life, there is a LOT of housecleaning that needs to be done. God has been digging around us, through us, and scrubbing us down, because He was about to turn the tables in our marriage and restore all that the enemy has tried to steal, kill and destroy over time.
For a wife to be truly submissive to her husband, she has to be vulnerable. She has to trust him completely and more importantly she has to trust that God will watch over the whole thing. This isn't easy, but it feels amazing as the spiritual shift takes place. God's word is never wrong. The word submission has gotten a really bad rap - as though being submissive means being a slave to your spouse. That isn't it at all. By submitting to my husband in the biblical sense, I concede to allowing him to be the man that God created him and designed him to be. The submission is part of my respecting him as the head of our household and our marriage. It is more of a heart condition and an attitude change. I can still be a strong, independent woman and acknowledge that God placed Kenny over me and that God has my best interest at heart.
I also believe that for a man to step up to be the head of the household and the marriage also requires vulnerability on the husband's part. He has to trust when he steps up to the task, his wife will follow. A husband can't just bully his way to the head. It takes prayer, godliness, determination and commitment to your marriage. It takes courage. Being a godly man is not for wimps and sissies.
All these years God has been tenderly and compassionately getting us lined up for what He wanted to do with us. Somewhere during that night, it was as if God said "Hold on!" and with that He grabbed us, moved us, transformed us and a seismic shift took the broken places in our lives and reset them they way He designed them to be. The tables were turned, the enemy defeated and the victory won.