Without any question, God gave me children in order to draw me closer to Him and to teach me what my relationship with Him should look like. Everything else about my children is just pure bonus. I try not to write details about my children's lives, because it is their story to tell. However, Jesus spoke so strongly to me in this lesson that I just have to share it.
Our 21 year old son is in some transitions in his life. He would call it growing up. As the mother, I call it leaving the nest too soon. This last week there were some decisions that he made that were fine, but I just kept thinking - "This is what I sacrificed all those years for? This is it?" I wanted to shout out: Don't you know how much I gave up for you to have a full and abundant life? Don't you know how many sleepless nights I have had in prayer on your behalf? Don't you know how many times I didn't buy something for me so that you could have something nicer? Don't you know how many times I denied myself so that you wouldn't be denied? Don't you know that you have at your disposal all the comforts of life that I have? And this is what you choose?!
As the list was playing like a movie in my head, the Lord stopped it for a brief announcement. He said "don't you know all that I sacrificed for you and this is what you choose." Ouch. I have at my disposal all the resources and authority of Christ and yet I whine about what I don't have and the oppression I sometimes feel under. His Word is overflowing with his promises and provisions and I know that I have not begun to tap into all that He has for me. He made the sacrifice that conquered death, that overrules all the power and authorities, that provides abundant life, that promises the provision of my daily needs and so much more. And how often do I choose worry, fear, doubt, lack of faith, anxiety? How often do I choose to walk in my circumstances instead of in the power of Christ? Oh - ouch again.
He made the ultimate sacrifice for me and provides the ultimate gift and provisions for my life if I choose to receive them and walk in them. May my life look more like the recipient of the greatest sacrifice than a life that says "this is what you choose?".