I Stand Amazed

Tuesday's are my favorite. For three years, every Tuesday night I was involved in a women's bible study at a camp. Every other Tuesday night a group of men were meeting at our house for prayer and bible study. Very seldom was I home when all the men converged on our basement.

Then God took a different turn with the women's bible study and so now I am home every other Tuesday night while the men meet here. I have been blessed over and over and over again in so many ways by what I experience on those Tuesday nights.

Tonight was no different. The front porch light was off and most of the men enter through the garage. As I sat in the office, I heard footsteps on the porch and a knock at the door. Since the 'regulars' know to walk in the garage and find their way around, I figured this might be someone new.

I went out to the living room, opened the front door and I don't know who was more shocked me or them. They were expecting to come to a men's bible study and here was some woman answering the door and not a man to be seen. (They were in the basement - remember?) My shock was that these two young men, with bibles in hand, couldn't have been more than 25 and I am guessing younger.

Honestly, I hate to admit this, but I thought they were lost. They were the youngest men I have seen come to bible study at our house. As a good hostess, I offered them coffee and they just kind of looked at me funny. I'm not used to that reaction to an offer for coffee, but once I got over myself I showed them to the basement.

Then I think I hummed right out loud the song "I Stand Amazed". It might not have sounded like that to an untrained ear, but Jesus knew. He knows what tune I'm humming even if it really sounds like a poor dog yelping. It's the heart that counts and my heart was beltin' out a tune of joy and praise.

Because I truly do stand amazed at how God works. I pray that those two young men bring their friends and that they shed new light into the lives of those men who aren't, well, in their 20's anymore. And I pray that those more mature fellas feed into those young men and encourage them in their walk with the Lord.

There is much to be gained when more than one generation of godly men gather together to seek after the LORD. Much to be gained when they bow before God in prayer.

As an interesting side note. Charles H. Gabriel, 1856 - 1932, wrote the original version of this song. In his biography, it says that "Settlers in that area (Iowa) often gathered in the Gabriel home for singing sessions and fellowship." My husband and I might not ever write songs, but we believe in gathering often in our home for fellowship. And we invite people who can sing. It's good for some things to stay the same.

Consider the Homeless

All day today it seemed that my thoughts and prayers kept returning to those who are homeless. I'm not exactly sure why, but I know that God kept laying it on my heart to pray for them today. And so I did. I have friends who have been homeless. They are without question some of my favorite people in my life. Their lives are rich in many ways that someone who has never been homeless would never know. I am blessed to call them my friend.

On my way to and from work every day I drive past two houses not far from us that sit empty. One I am not really sure why it is vacant and the other one most likely a foreclosure based on the way it was left. These houses have also been sitting empty for quite awhile now with no "for sale" signs in the front yard. I don't know what happened in either case. But then I started wondering, what a difference it might make if all those houses that have been sitting empty for so long could be used to house all the people who have been homeless in the last year. Just wondering.

This Bloomberg report stated the following:

"About 18.9 million homes in the U.S. stood empty during the second quarter as surging foreclosures helped push ownership to the lowest level in a decade."

Fox news reported this:

"Overall, 1.56 million people spent at least one night in emergency shelters or transitional housing, the report said. One-third of those individuals were part of a homeless family.

Volunteers counted 643,000 homeless people, sheltered and on the streets, during one given night in January 2009, the report said."

It seems to me there a lot more vacant homes than there are homeless people. I know there are many more factors to consider, but sometimes I get tired of rationalizing away hope. Sometimes it's just good to consider the homeless and consider how we might make things different.

The $5 Giving Challenge

For the last several weeks I keep hearing "be generous", "be generous", "be generous". God just seems to be telling me the same thing over and over and over. The Scriptures are full of commands and instructions on being generous. Somehow I have felt as though God has a very specific purpose in pushing me to be generous beyond our regular tithes and offerings. As I have continued to seek God's instruction as to what He desires, there is something that has come to mind that I am really excited about.

After many months of couponing, sales, stockpiling and playing the drug-store game, my cupboards are overflowing. There are bags of items waiting to go to the homeless shelter this week. There are items bagged and ready to give to a Christian pregnancy program for new moms. We regularly give out of our cupboards to others as well.

So this week I am going to start something new: "The $5.00 Challenge". The goal is to take $5.00 and with the drug-store sales, Kroger deals and coupons get as much food or other items as I can to donate to food banks, homeless shelters or others. In other words, the challenge is to see how much I can get for my $5.00 by spending wisely and taking advantage of sales and coupons.

So far I have purchased: (2) full size Secret deodorants; (1) Oil of Olay Quench Body Wash 23.6 oz; (1) Oil of Olay Ultra Moisture Lotion 11.8 oz; (4) cans of Campbell's Select Harvest Healthy Request Soup - 18.6 oz each; and (1) can of sliced peaches. Total spent: $3.07

Krogers is having some amazing sales this week so I will most likely grab more groceries that are on sale. I can get another 4 boxes of name brand cereal for $1.96 total which would finish out the $5.00. For the $5.00 invested, I was able to purchase $29.49 worth of name brand products.

"Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. Each many should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver." 2 Corinthians 9:6-7

Just doing what I love so that others might benefit and giving all the glory to God.

Blessings to you

Kim

Less is So Much More

For months now I have been mulling over thoughts of living a simpler life and what that might look like. I tend to get excited about something, want to just 'get going' and then realize that it might not be very realistic in the long run. But a simpler way of life just keeps drawing me back.

When we moved three years ago, I remember feeling such shame over all the stuff we owned. It just didn't seem right. I felt horrible guilt as I watched our dear friends hauling out load after load after load of material objects. I swore that I would never be burdened by that much stuff again. So we got rid of a few things. Well actually we got rid of a lot of things, but it was few in comparison to what was left.

We moved into our current home and I felt reasonably okay with what was left. Not great, but not guilty any longer. Funny though. The rooms are beginning to shrink again with things that we (I) hold onto just in case we might need them someday. I come by this honestly. I remember my dad wanting to keep the spring off of a broken mouse trap once because you just never know when you might need a spring that size. My mom threw it out. So this is not all my fault, it is in my DNA.

A little over a year ago I started seriously couponing and stockpiling and while that has simplified our finances and allowed us to bless others, it has not necessarily simplified our storage. So currently, I am focusing on some new ways to shop, save and share as Ellie Kay says. God calls us to be good stewards of our finances and material possessions. God also calls us to be generous and to share, as well as to save for the future so that we are not a burden on others.

Throw into all of this the fact that in the last two weeks, my i-pod just quit. Worked fine and then didn't work at all. Four days later my cell phone just disappears from cyberspace. The phone worked, but somehow my phone number got lost in space. Seriously. My phone and my number could not find each other. After three days of on again and off again with the phone, our computer crashes and is eaten alive by a nasty virus. I have two words for you "back up". Needless to say we are paying for not having backed up all of our digital pictures and files. They are recovered, but there is a price to pay. Alas, I just got off the phone with our internet provider because our internet was not working properly.

As I climbed back behind the TV to get to the modem for the internet and I once again looked at all the wires and cables and dust, it just reminded me of how complicated life got in trying to be more efficient. Exactly when did this happen?

So into the office I went to find a book I recently got from the library. "Freedom of Simplicity" by Richard Foster. I really want to just write out the entire first two pages here for you to read. But how about just a small taste of what Richard Foster has to say:

Contemporary culture is plagued by the passion to possess. The unreasoned boast abounds that the good life is found in accumulation, that "more is better". Indeed, we often accept this notion without question, with the result that the lust for affluence in contemporary society has become psychotic: it has completely lost touch with reality. Furthermore, the pace of the modern world accentuates our sense of being fractured and fragmented. We feel strained, hurried, breathless. The complexity of rushing to achieve and accumulate more and more threatens frequently to overwhelm us; it seems there is no escape from the rat race.

Interestingly, Richard Foster wrote this book in 1981. Somehow when I look back on my own life, 1981 didn't seem so complicated to me; which tells me that there is something even far more simpler than I can imagine.

I don't believe there are easy answers or a one-size-fits all answer to living a simpler life. Each person or family faces different situations or challenges and must seek God's direction for them personally.

However, I have found a few things to be true. By changing my spending habits, thoughts and routines, spending less has resulted in us having more. Less on my calendar has resulted in more quality family time with my husband and children. Less ministry obligations has resulted in more personal ministry. Perhaps less really is so much more.

The Blessing of Noise

I believe we may have the noisiest dishwasher known to man that was ever manufactured in this decade. Seriously - for something that looks so sleek in its stainless steel decor, it is loud - really LOUD. Please understand I love my dishwasher. Several years ago, we had a quiet dishwasher and I thought I would be more frugal and do our dishes by hand. Certainly didn't want to waste the electric. Then we moved. And our house didn't have a dishwasher. In fact, the water pump was known to just stop at random and we didn't even have water. On top of that the sinks were really small and not very deep and so the dirty dishes would quickly run onto the counter if not done quickly. Oh how I longed for a dishwasher then!

We moved and God blessed me with another dishwasher and one of the stainless steel line. Oh happy was I. I am not all about looks and having the latest gadgets, but this was just nice and already part of the kitchen. We had an open floor plan again, which means for us that the dining area and the living room and kitchen all open into one another. Exactly the way I like it. We had a house once where the kitchen was completely separate from the other living areas and I hated it. I always felt like I wasn't able to participate in all the family fun. So this house, with this floor plan and this dishwasher was a grand gift from God indeed.

However, this dishwasher causes just a few complaints from various family members who either live here or come to visit for any extended period. Quite frankly, I try to arrange the washing of the dishes around our schedules of guests or other quiet time. Personally I think it's loud too, but I am just really, really grateful to have it.

As I loaded up the dishwasher today and knew that I would be running it during the football pre-game shows, it occurred to me that the dishwasher should be a constant reminder of the overflowing blessings in my life. Because you see I can't run it when:

1. Our grandson Simon is here and he is napping.

2. Our children are here and we are having family dinner and good conversation

3. The men's bible study is meeting at our house

4. The women's bible study is meeting at our house

5. We are watching TV (translated to mean: thankful we have a TV and have eyes and ears to watch and hear it)**

6. We have company

7. We are spending time in the Word of God and seeking silence

And I am blessed that I have to run it because:

1. We have had food to eat

2. There is fresh, hot banana-blueberry bread cooling on the counter

3. There are coffee cups to wash after having shared it with my husband

4. There are extra dirty dishes because our children have come to visit and eat with us

5. There are extra dirty cups from the fellowship of bible study groups

6. We have coffee to drink from the cups :)

7. I have a mixer and mixing bowls to use to make desserts

8. I have pans to wash that were used on the blessing of our stove

9. We have electric to make it run

10. We have the hope of another meal to put on the plates

Oh Lord that I might see the blessings in the midst of the noise.

**My husband tells me this is not true - that I won't be watching TV, but will be napping, which may or may not be true, but will definitely be likely.

Stages of Life

My daughter recently asked "when do mom's actually get to sleep through the night"? Simon is only 9 months old and his sleep and eating patterns change, which means that Jillian and Shane don't always see many hours of continuous sleep sometimes. She asked this of me about a month ago when she knew that I had been up during the night praying for my children.

I always figured that whatever age my kids were was the most difficult, especially the pre-teen to teenage years. While there were plenty of good and wonderful things, there were also lots of fearful times and trying times. For example - the first time you let your 16-year old drive in the snow to school or the first time they start dating someone or when they head off to college or . . . or . . . or. The list could go on. You get the point.

And then I had adult children. Yep, that's what happens if you see them through the teenage and college years and you all live to tell about it without having strangled one another. No one tells you about this stage. You just don't hear about it. When our kids lived at home, I knew if they came home safely and were in bed. I knew if they were eating and had enough money (they'd ask for more if they didn't). I knew they were warm and healthy and had what they needed.

But then they grow up and move out. That's when you inherit a whole different set of concerns and prayers for them. I can't quite explain it, but you just want to make sure everything in their life is good. It is usually best if they don't tell me about a mean co-worker, customer or other mean adult in their life, because I have discovered the Mean Mama in me rises to the surface and wants to have a word or two with anyone who would dare insult or hurt my children or their feelings. I know that is very mature of me, but it's the truth. Don't mess with my family.

Then there are grandchildren. I watched my daughter and son-in-law feeding Simon tonight. What fun! As he opened his little mouth with great expectation of the next bite of baby food. He would open and there they were ready, able and prepared to meet Simon's needs. I am so extremely grateful for every part of that.

But something within me wondered what a mother must feel like if her child is hungry and she can't feed him. I thought about Hagar sitting in the desert with Ishmael and how she had nothing for him to eat and was forced to put him under a bush and wait for him to die. God saw them in their desperation and rescued them.

While I want everything to be right in my children's lives, I sometimes forget the abundance of blessings that surround us and the great gifts and comforts with which we live. God sees us. All the way home tonight from our daughter and son-in-law's house, I kept thinking about how God must feel about us. If I take offense when one of my children is offended or hurt, how much more so will God look after his children when the enemy attacks. If I am up at the wee hours of the morning and night praying for my children, how much more so is Jesus Christ who sits at the right hand of God and lives to intercede for us. If I delight in watching my children and grandson and spending time with them, how much more so must God delight in spending time with us.

I am continually amazed at what God teaches me about my relationship with Him through my relationships with my children. Isaiah 49:25b says: "I will contend with those who contend with you, and your children I will save". The LORD "will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom." Isaiah 40:28

While I will fall asleep and am not always able to contend with those who contend with my children, I am so thankful that the Lord won't grow tired or weary and that He will fight for us. To God be the glory forever and ever. Amen!

P.S. Found this quote after I wrote this post. I think I'm going to post it all over my house!

"AS A MOTHER, MY JOB IS TO TAKE CARE OF WHAT IS POSSIBLE AND TRUST GOD WITH THE IMPOSSIBLE.”--RUTH BELL GRAHAM

When I Grow Up I Want to Be A . . . ?

Remember as a little kid how everyone would ask you what you wanted to be when you grew up? I wanted to be a teacher. In second grade our teacher made us draw pictures of what we wanted to do when we grew up and I drew a math teacher. As a child, I would head to the basement of our house and pretend I had a classroom full of students as I taught them math and worked out the problems on the chalkboard. Once I tried to impress a group of adults in high school by telling them I wanted to get my Ph.D. in computer science. I had no idea what that would involve, but it sounded good. Being a professional figure skater crossed my mind, but I don't ice skate. In sixth grade I thought I wanted to be a back-up singer for someone famous - like K.C. and the Sunshine Band. But I can't sing. Oh and I'm not a teacher either.

A few weeks ago, I turned 45 and I am still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. My math is still pretty good and so I would say I am at mid-life. My grandmothers lived to either be 90 or close to it, so I am at the half-way mark. Plenty of time to decide if God blesses me with many more years.

Except here is the problem, if I want to follow God and his leading and be obedient there is a good chance my ideas for my life probably aren't going to line up the way I think. Goodness knows they haven't in the last 7 years. I think one thing and God points me a different way.

But there are a few things that keep coming to mind. I want to be intentional. I want to be intentional in the time I spend with my husband and my children and grandson. I want to be intentional in my relationship with Jesus Christ. I don't want a mediocre life.

I want to simplify and take time to rest. I want to pursue Jesus passionately, but not burn out. I want to live with a bold faith, but remain humble. I want to be the church and not just go to church. I want to encourage other women in their walk with the Lord and in life - marriage, kids, money, and all the other stuff. I want to be frugal and give generously. I want to pray more and trust God more. I want to have a grateful heart, not a greedy heart. I want to memorize the scriptures and live life like I have.

Occupation? Well that's just a title. What I do for a living when I grow up and who I am when I grow up aren't the same. Jesus was a carpenter - that's what He did. Who Jesus was - well that's different. I want to be like Jesus.